As Good As It Gets

Wipe your tears away , here comes the sunny days . No more worries cause the storm is gone and I'm here to stay . I know it's hard for you , the pain you're going through . And by looking at you , I feel the hurt you do . Through the good and the bad times , I'll be there . Keep your head up high , don't you ever feel despaired . I'm always here for you and you know this much is true . If you're ever feeling doubt, I'll come and comfort you .

I keep wondering . Did I do wrong till she always want to keep all her account hidden ? Till she blocked me like I am a stalker . I am her friend and why only one or few people are allowed to know about her account ? Am I that terrible that she did it even though I knew it already ? I am not stupid . I am her friend for 4 years . I know her attitude really well because I love her even she didn't communicate a lot with me , playing around with me . Just tell me why . I keep this feeling for almost 2 years already . And I can't bear it because I am tired of thinking why she do that . I know some people just need space from the world and from who they are . She let others but not me and why is that ? I knew it , she knew it and I am hurt . I care about her but I didn't show it . People really don't know but I always protect her from stranger because she is special . I know that we never know what's on each other minds . A friend said that there's a pain she want to hide by spacing out from others and why I did I do not know about that ? Others knew it . Why it is not me to know ? I just don't understand . Sometimes , I saw her always willingly give others this one thing and whenever I want it too , I doubt to ask her . Because she give other person willingly , not like me . I feel like she doesn't want to give me . It's not that I am not trusting , not believing . I'm afraid that she's not there for me , I'm afraid she hates me . I'm afraid she's pretending in front of me . I do love her but I guess we are too awkward . I'm afraid of myself . I'm afraid  I did wrong . I'm afraid I am annoying . I'm afraid I will not have her trust . I'm afraid I'm not a good friend . Yeah , that's true that she wouldn't speak to me if she doesn't love me . She would've just ignored me when I talk to her . But sometimes I need her to understand me too